Hello my gays! So this is a thing. There is a distinct difference between “gay hot” and “straight hot.” Some men who are gay get hit on by straight women and are often lacking attention from their gay bros. Some straight men get hit on by gay guys all day, but can’t score with a lady.
Now, I think we can all agree that there are some seriously hot straight guys out there. But, our little gaydars ping them as straight. Aw, too bad, right? Straight hot is when a gay guy is attractive to both straight men and women. The women want to have his babies the men want to look more like him. And, ironically some gay guys can’t tell they’d go to bat with them (And by go to bat, I mean screwing). Gay hot is when a straight guy attracts gay men. Is it their body language? Is it their physique? This might forever remain a mystery dude. Well, I guess I can try to figure in some factors that may be contributing to this phenomenon. What are some things we pick up on that signals that a man is gay? Maybe his body. He may be statuesque or super thin. Maybe these gay hot guys dress like one of our gay sub-sects. Maybe the gay hot straight guy is wearing excessively tight fitting clothes. Maybe he has a goatee and smokes cigars like a leather daddy might. Will we ever truly know? Alas, there is an entire group of straight men who are forever being hit on by gay men. Poor guys, maybe they should just hook up with the next hot gay guy that tries, amiright?
As far as straight hot guys go, Perhaps they’re missing a certain twinkle in their eyes. Maybe they dress a bit too sloppily in a sports jersey and baseball cap. Is their hair poorly styled? Maybe they drive a mini van or enjoy their favorite pair of dad-jeans. I kind of feel sorry for these guys, if they’re missing out on the gay attention they truly deserve. Here’s a novel idea. The straight hot gay guy should play to his straight hot strengths. He’d be clever to help a gay guy live out a popular fantasy. Pretend that the gay guy has persuaded him to try having some gay sex for the first time. That’s right let that toppy-flag fly and treat a gay to his first “turning.”
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Could this be a myth? I asked around and I got some interesting responses. I posed a simple question: “Is there such a thing as straight hot?” I’m lucky to have some really thoughtful buds. ALL of them responded with a resounding “Yes.” Their explanations were slightly varied, but for the most part they chalked it up to the “The Male Gayze.” It is an idea that gay men view men very differently than straight men. We, gay dudes, have extreme body image standards that many of our straight dude counterparts do not. When straight guys look at a guy their gaze lands on firstly their muscles and secondly their face. If the guy appears to be ripped and his face is fairly symmetrical this constitutes straight hot. Gay guys employing their “gayze,” tend to let their eyes land not only on the muscles of the torso and the handsomeness of a man’s face. Our appraisal includes the groin, thighs and buttocks (yum!). Beyond the physical here seems to be a psychological aspect to straight hot versus gay hot. For decades gay guys have let media (porn, TV, movies, news) shape the way we visually expect gay guys to look. Shows like Queer as Folk and Looking offer a narrow view of what gay dudes look like. Think of those go-go dancers in the club. Mostly white, tall and muscular. When we think of gay hot guys, that is a familiar image that pops into mind. Straight guys have been depicted a bit more true to life. There are a vast set of body types that go beyond the comic book, superhero body type. The straight guy comes in a variety of shapes and sizes in our media. That doesn’t mean that gay guys of color and different body types aren’t there. It just speaks to an underrepresentation of them. So when straight guys identify a guy as hot, their drawing from a different set of images and ideas. Gay men seem to have a more hard-coded definition of hotness.
There you have it. The difference between what makes that hot, gay guy delicious to you. Straight dudes are coming from a completely different place. Straight dudes probably think Peyton Manning is a babe. While we, the gays, prefer Mr. Tom Brady. Thanks for reading bros! Onward and upward super dongs!